2 Years

Two years ago today, I woke up in my parents' house to see sunshine filtering in through the windows. I remember the way the breeze from the ceiling fan felt, as I laid there under the covers thinking about the day awaiting me.

The day...

My wedding day.

At 7:00 that evening, I would be marrying Timothy Ross O'Neill. I would be changing my last name to match his, and I would finally get to wear my mother's beautiful wedding dress. It was the day I had dreamt of, all my life... it was finally here.

- - -

It has been two years, and I can still remember the calm of that day. There was no stress. I never experienced a moment of fear, of panic, or insecurity. Clearly, I can recall the details that many brides say they cannot... the way the food tasted, my dance with my daddy, and the way I hugged my brother at the end of the night.

I remember the way the lilting music sounded, as I walked out of the bridal room with my hand resting on my dad's arm, and the way Tim looked at me.

The way he still looks at me.

At the end of an aisle, in front of a minister... I remember knowing peace.

- - -

In two days, we will leave for Italy to celebrate our second anniversary. Last year, we went to Paris and Normany, France. This year, we are puddle-jumping to Florence and Venice... and I am so excited. *Understatement*

Our closet floor is covered with piles of (my) clothes, waiting to be tried on one last time before being ready to throw into a suitcase. My daydreams the past several days have largely centered around gelato, espresso, cheese, olives, and of course... pasta. It will be magnanimous, in every way. It is the trip of a lifetime.

But if I am honest, the thing I am the most excited about - more than the sightseeing or the gelato - is hanging out with my best friend.

- - -

When you are standing there at the altar on your wedding day, looking into each other's eyes and making life-long promises... there is never any way to know what lies ahead. You choose to act on the love that the Lord has confirmed. You choose to trust. You jump out in faith, and you promise to commit to for the rest of your life. In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer... you say it and mean it - but the contrast between each of those categories can't help but seem small, when everything is lit by candlelight.

As I sit here thinking over the past two years, looking at how those contrasts have developed and grown, I know in my heart what a good and right choice I made on August 26, 2011. Sitting here on a sofa in Nashville, TN... I know that same peace I felt, when I looked at Tim and first said those vows.

Since that moment, we have experienced joys we could not have imagined. We have waded through some heartaches that we didn't know we would have to wrestle through. We have communicated in apologies, just as much as we have communicated with kisses or laughter. It's been fun. It's been (at times) maddening... it's been a thousand emotions and a thousand truths, living themselves out under one roof.

It has been a glorious two years.

And I recognize, two years in, that I am only just beginning to understand what it means to be married. To love unconditionally. To live selflessly. To serve, wholeheartedly. To be a friend, and not just a wife. To be a wife, and not just a friend. When you're standing at the altar, is there any way to know...?

The Lord is so faithful, to continue teaching us all these things in His time.

- - -

This next week, I plan on having the time of my life. I plan on savoring spaghetti sauce like I never have before (and probably never will again), and I plan on taking so many pictures with my iPhone that I win the tourist of the year award. I will drink my caffe and slowly turn the pages of my book... I will know that I am in Italy, and I plan to revel in the escape of it all.

But I already know, that the best part of it all will be having Tim right there beside me. It has been the best part, since the day I met him. And just like our vows first proclaimed two years ago... the best part, it always will be.

Happy two years, Tim... I love you :)