Room 525

there is just something about sitting in a hotel room alone, that always does me in - just in the sense that it resets me... my heart, its motivations and its distractions. something about the buzz of the air conditioning unit, the smell of the starched cotton sheets, the sulfury way the water tastes, no matter which city you are in... everything serves its mundane purpose same as always, but this time there is a human listening to the buzzes, paying attention to the way the water tastes, and noticing how incredibly lonely hotel rooms can seem if examined too closely. a person's whims and silly daydreams tend to dissipate in these moments - leaving reality and Truth as company for the ready and listening heart. all the details of the past two weeks suddenly converge into a story, an epiphany, a piercing arrow... and inevitably, one climactic moment from all the days and moments will slowly emerge from the mundane.

- - -

recently, i was given a chance to bring a certain portion of the past two years to somewhat of a resting place. i say only somewhat, because resting normally means merely a replenishment of sorts... and why would we be created to anticipate that state of feeling replenished, if there wasn't still work to be done after acquiring it? anyway. the work is for a later time. last week, over coffee and tea, i spoke with a friend - one of the truest i've known on this earth. over those cups of coffee and tea, an opportunity to reach one such resting place was extended - confessions were stated, and by love, were received. to say i am grateful to God... in this case, those words almost mock the truth they seek to convey. what do i say to explain the past several days?

the story has shifted. something has lifted. i feel confidence in places that have for two years felt unsure. some part of me has been restored. i love words, but honestly, words are jumbled efforts at this point. all i know, is that this is hope - to have received forgiveness, to have found a resting place in a very un-expected place... to be excited about the work still to be done.

- - -

as the buzzing continues and the neighbor's TV blares, still... these hotel rooms are no match tonight against a heart that's full of hope. worries, distractions, insecurities, and unknowns... read the sign: no vacancy.

please do not disturb.