Complaining

Philippians 2:14-15 "Do all things without grumbling or disputing... so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world."

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It's not a personality thing. It's a sin thing.

Let me start with a confession... this issue of grumbling and complaining is NOT something I have perfected. I daily find myself in situations that require me to make a conscious behavioral change or apology in this area.

But I have noticed during the past year, that the Lord has been bringing this issue to my attention in increasing frequency. It's been something I'm more consistently convicted about, in my own life - and something I've paid closer attention to in the lives of those around me. And the conclusion I've continued to come to, is that as followers of Christ... we are responsible.

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I'm able to articulate my feelings and thoughts, fairly well. This is great for writing, teaching, or persuading... but admittedly, it is an awful temptation when days aren't going so well.

When my back hurts, because I'm pregnant and suddenly everything feels weird... it's tempting to feel the need to express that. When something has confused me or thrown me off-balance, and I can't figure out what's going on or how to fix a situation, speech often becomes the avenue for processing my thoughts. In those moments, it's a temptation for me to grumble.

As I mentioned earlier - the Lord has graciously continued to refine me in this area - and I have seen improvement throughout the years. But it's still a prayer, every day of my life - that I would not be a woman who grumbles or leads someone to believe that the Holy Spirit is not alive within me, by my grumpy countenance or the negative words I say.

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One of the things I respect and admire most about my husband, is that he doesn't complain. I've never heard him gripe about how the weather is going to crush our plans. I've never once heard him grumble about hard work that needs to be done, or the lack of sleep he sometimes gets on the road. He engages situations with joy, and it is a magnetizing quality that puts people at ease (including me).

He's not naïve, overly optimistic, or living in denial. He can clearly see and admit that life is at times difficult, draining, or heart-wrenching.

But he doesn't complain about it. He's content and secure in the life and the blessings that God has provided him (and us), and it speaks loudly in his silence. It's one of the things I love most about him. I need his presence and example in my life, to continue encouraging and sharpening me in this area.

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One of my favorite Scripture verses has always been Philippians 4:8: "Finally, brothers and sisters - whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things."

If anything is excellent or praiseworthy... think about that thing. It's a word of instruction to us, as followers of Christ - but it's also a key to avoiding the temptation to grumble.

As a follower of Christ, my countenance, behaviors, and words all communicate what is in my heart, to the world around me. (Luke 6:45) That doesn't require me to deny the reality of valleys, losses, difficult seasons, hurts, grief, sudden changes of plan, or disappointments - far from it! I am still responsible to deal with all of those things honestly and fully, before the Lord. (In fact, He invites us to bring every single thing to Him in prayer, and He draws near to the broken. Phil. 4:6; Psalm 147:3; Psalm 23:4; 1 Peter 5:7)

But what it does mean is that I need to use some self-control at times. I might need to adjust some habits, so that I end up praying quietly more than I end up speaking audibly. It might even mean that I re-think certain relationships, and how much time I'm spending around people who consistently complain.

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Despite the way its often presented... grumbling, complaining, and consistently wearing the badge of hardships is not a personality issue. It is a choice. As followers of Christ, we have been pursued, restored, set free, and given much! Our inheritance is joy, and our hope is unshakeable.

My prayer is that my countenance and my behaviors would continue to more often agree with that identity...

"So that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world." (Phil. 2:15)