wintry mixes... lately

the past three weeks, i haven't had much time to sit still... but after months of feeling like my entire life was sitting still, this is a welcome feeling! it is so refreshing, to have a break from the "trying" to find something to do. i know there are many people who would probably hate me for these types of comments... but i will risk your wrath. it has been entirely uncomfortable and scary these past several months, to feel like my hands were wasting idle and fearing that my freedom was undirected. it has been a test of my faith, unique from anything i have never known - to trust daily that God has poured purpose into this waiting, that His Spirit is alive when all else feels dormant.

we've probably all heard it said before or experienced it ourselves - that the times of "waiting in the wilderness" are the times when we often learn to cling the hardest to our Savior... when our faith is finally forced to that next level, beyond what is merely felt. when the choice simply becomes either to rise up and embrace what feels to be aimless, while resting in Truth... or continue through our days with a heart fearing the aimless and therefore, placing our trust in our doubts. i made my decision, and i am daily continuing to make it... those are not the type of days that i want to live.

- - -

so i am sitting at Panera in Nashville, just around the corner from where i will meet the bus in a few minutes and embark to Pennsylvania... city 10 of 47. although my body is feeling very much under the weather, i have much to look forward to this weekend. it is supposed to be extremely cold again this weekend where we are headed, and snow will be awaiting our arrival... this thrills me :) although ice and snow does make equipment more difficult to haul up hills and ramps, you will not hear me complaining. this Memphis girl will take whatever she can get when it comes to wintry mixes and frozen precipitation.

and speaking of wintry mixes... that might be an appropriate way to end this short summary of my life lately. my days are a mix of all winter's joys and also, its frozen places... like all living things, i am appreciating the rest - but there is preparation taking place under frozen ground.

my heart is waiting for the thaw, like the flowers and trees ache with growth ready for Spring. as outside the temperatures warm, hope is being restored to this heart - and i find joy in this promise, that Spring is on its way.